Jean-Baptiste Maunier

I missed out too much being born in Singapore. 

hello hello hello hello how low

SYF is in a week. If we get another Silver, I will hide under the concert hall's seat and cry like a baby.

Home's a place where we've grown

All of us are done for. 

We all live in a beautiful world. Whether we see it as beautiful depends on our perspective and mindset.

I just received a text message that made me beam. Plastered smile I swear. On the other hand, I received a text message before that informing me that SYF is on the 6th of April. Plastered worry I swear. And  early in the morning I received a text message about Physics. Didn't react much to it though. I see how text messages can affect your mood. Weird. Advancements in technology have made a significant difference in our lives though not all of us see it. Pity.

I'm reading a book titled "Paris Requiem". Pretty good book. Grabbed my attention in the first few pages when the whole scene reminds me of the scene described in "Perfume: Story of a Murderer". I made judgements but was not disappointed so that's good I guess. Unfortunately, I need to return the book in 4 days time. Pity.

So after 'extra lessons' today, I went to the library and managed to accomplish more than expected! Not a pity.

Many of those I know have a misconception that I am afraid of O levels. I'm not. I'm actually afraid of January 10/11.

I have a problem, I hate people I don't even know. That is wrong, isn't it?

Some people can really piss me off

Even parents.

Boy did they have fun behind the sea

I feel like I'm getting more muscular. Which does not look good. because as my muscles grow bigger, my fats still stay and with that, I just look fatter. Does it help that a majority of the world population finds fat ugly? I know I am ugly so I just don't want to get uglier.

Solution to this problem is to not go for jogging and P.E. But that is highly impossible because I use those periods to relive my childhood and have fun. I realise that all my laughs and smiles during jogging and P.E. are sincere. I feel really happy to be able to step out the students' graveyard and feel alive.

So the solution to that problem is to go on a diet. On the other hand, I need to eat. especially when I am hungry. Because in being a Biology student, I know what happens to the body if it lacks food et cetera. So I do not want any physical internal problems that I can't see and solve easily to rise.

Solution to that problem, is to not study Biology so that I don't get influenced by the things that I learn However, Biology is one of the subjects I take in school and I can't ignore it. It's one of my core subjects. And plus, it is good to learn about new things. Reason for that, knowledge is power. Also, Islam encourages us to know more, and since I have the opportunity, I should take it and treasure it.

And so, the solution to that problem, is to not go to school. Fuck it, living in Singapore is hell.

Think high,look low

Somewhere down this road, I know I'll find a place. 'I do not care where I go. So it does not matter which road I take'. All my efforts to complete my homework with quality and hand in assignments on time will pay off sooner or later. I know that I will end up in a good school after Cedar. I know that I will get scholarships to further my studies in a good university. I know that I will be an opthamologist. I have set my goals. This road that I'm taking will get me there. I will get it. I know I will. I decide my own fate.

It does not matter if I am popular. It does not matter if my friends and families think I'm out of my mind. I don't care if I get unacceptable grades for now. I won't give attention to the popular and unpopular. Instead, I will follow the 'correct'. It doesn't matter if my social circle gets smaller and smaller because I know that it will get bigger in time. I don't care that my mum and dad are not the richest people in the world. I don't need money to have brains and knowledge. All the grudges society holds against me will be ignored.

I, however, have to stop procrastinating. I need to be driven and be self-directed. I have to keep myself motivated and not be demoralised by my unappealing grades or by others who are getting better grades. I will keep trying and make sure I understand everything that is being taught. I must clarify any doubts and also question what has not been questioned.

I will do my best. I can only say 'I' because that is the sad truth. It is I who determines my future. No one else will care where I go but me. So I will try and I will put in my 110% effort to achieve my goals in life.